False alarm call to surgery

Here is an update on the doctors' attempt to try feeding through her gtube again. After about 3 hours she was still sleeping on her belly and I heard some wet breathing noises. I stood up and looked and she had refluxed milk all over her blanket. It was coming from her mouth and her nose. I called the nurse over and it was coming from her gtube site a little as well. The nurse initially thought that her tube was coming out so they immediately called surgery. The surgeon came in and said it was fine but that the wafer had moved and needed to be tightened down. I mentioned this to a couple of nurses over the past couple weeks and they both said no it wasn't supposed to be moved. The surgeon tightened it up and was bidding his farewells when I told him he wasn't going anywhere so fast because I had been asking to speak to surgery all week.

I asked him about the reason surgery said they did not want to revise her fundo. He said of course one reason is because of the risks involved but mainly because on the upper GI study they did when she arrived a month ago, there was no evidence of reflux. I remember that day and I remember her refluxing later that day. I stared at him with a look that I know said much worse things than the words coming from my mouth. My reply was, "Her nurse and I just suctioned a large amount of partially digested milk from her nose and mouth. No one can tell me she is not refluxing regardless of what a very short test says." I then pulled back a blanket and showed him some of the evidence on her bedding. He replied, "Yes, but the test does not show reflux."

Frustration does not even come close to what I was feeling at that moment. I will not offend you with the things going through my mind at that point and what I really wanted to say to him. Instead I was as polite as I could muster so I did not let my flesh get the best of me. I discussed a little further what my concerns were and asked for a little more information. Basically they want another reflux study before they would consider doing anything. Of course we stopped the feeds AGAIN. Her ND tube had already been taken out so they are going to let her rest and then attempt to insert it again later. It is a possibility that since the gtube was too loose that could be one reason the ND would not go in the correct place.

Even though I was so frustrated, as soon as the surgeon left I changed Teryn and sat rocking her and said "Lord, I praise you anyway. This did not turn out as I hoped it would but I know that you are still in control. I love you anyway and know that you still have your hand on Teryn"

I am not going to lie and say that is easy but in my heart I still know it is true.